Dreams

I couldn't find a good picture for this post. I'm sorry.

Every night, I dream. Actually, I can't remember the last night I haven't had a dream. It's kind of weird and I don't really get it, but that's the way it is.

Last night, I had one of those dreams that was so real, I woke up wondering if it actually happened. Now, a full day after having the dream, it's impressions on me have dulled and I don't remember as much, but i remember the basics and some of the thoughts I had.

In this dream, I was partaking in some illegal activity that no one else knew about. I don't know exactly what I was doing. Towards the end of the dream, the cops found out as well as everyone I knew and I was so ashamed of what I had done. They came to a building that I was in and I tried to hide, but eventually had to turn myself over to them. I remember seeing faces and feeling the disappointment of the people around me. It was heart wrenching! Right before I woke up, I sat awaiting the verdict of what was to happen.

Then, I woke up with two thoughts planted in my head. The first thought held the truth of God, my Father, knowing and perceiving every hateful, perverse, non-God honoring thought and action, whether it was private or public. He knows everything that goes on and some day, I will have to stand before his throne and give account for all of those.

The second thought planted was that of the punishment. It was almost a vision of me standing before Christ and him looking into my eyes with an unblinking gaze filled with strain and yet deep affection. No words came, but just a knowledge of what he accomplished.

After waking up and letting these "thoughts" soak in, I fell to my knees in humility of my "badness" and yet in praise of ... well, my King and his gift.